Saturday, August 13, 2011

Health, wealth and happiness

I never felt that I needed to defend my life and the choices that I've made thus far but the other day I was taken aback when someone had mentioned the fact that:  A.  I currently do not work.  And B.  I seem to have tons of time for making shit.

Between those simple statements was a whole hell of a lot of insinuation.

Immediately, I thought, scrrrrrrrew you.  And then, after all the anger and pride, I started to feel a bit hurt, insecure and lesser than anyone that worked a regular 9-5 job.

It had really hit me hard that some people would think that little about me and worse,

that I even cared.

I've been thinking about the whole situation for a while now and mulling over all my confused feelings to finally come to this conclusion that I wish I had told that initial person:

I love everything that I am currently you?

I love the fact that I make things for myself.

I love that I am always curious, always learning and always growing.

I love that I made the decision to dedicating my time to my graduate studies, pursuing my dream of one day teaching others.

I love that I have an understanding boyfriend and family who see my education as an investment for the future.

I love that I get to experience a new city, a better life, and a new purpose, here in San Francisco.

I love that I can sit down, open up and say this all right now.

So, can you say that you're currently in love with everything that you're doing?  

Some people find that joy in their Monday through Friday, 9am to 5pm job.  I couldn't.  I tried.  It sucked. 

Yes, I was independent and making my own money, but I also wasn't happy in my job.  Far from it, I was miserable.  Ultimately, I wasn't exploring new possibilities.  Each day was the same... 

I guess what I'm trying to say is that some people feel justified in making these kinds of comments to others in order to feel better about themselves and I've realized that.  I have taken a lot from this experience and no longer feel sad or remorse for myself.

If anything, I feel more defined.  I feel assured that the life I live may account for no one but myself and that I am forever grateful for each day and decision I make.


  1. That is awesome. Most people don't ponder those thoughts and arrive to that place of peace until much later in life. I commend you for your vision, thirst for knowledge and zest for enjoying the life that God has given you. Kudos!!!